Help! My Broker Sent Me Broke

Scott,

My husband died in September 2014. I was too emotional to invest the money I received, so I thought I would go with a broker to reduce my stress in those raw, grieving days. In April 2015 I gave $30,000 to a broker -- and by the end of August it was down $27,000 with just shy of $3,000 left in my trading account! I was livid. Obviously I had words with the broker.

He now has my account standing at $8,000, saying he will make it back up to the $30,000. But the damage of trust has been done. I am between a rock and a hard place. If I take out my money, he has no chance of recouping what he has lost. If I leave it there I am afraid to do any trades in case it all disappears. I suppose my question is this -- do I have any rights to recoup my losses from him?

Linda

Hi Linda,

You may as well have given your money to Tom Waterhouse to go bet with. Your broker has zero credibility and you should deal with this immediately. As in right bloody now.

Write a letter of complaint to your broker’s compliance manager that paraphrases what you told me, and attach copies of your statements. Sign off with the following: “Immediately withdraw all my remaining funds and compensate me for my losses.”

Under the dispute resolution process the broker has 45 days to respond to your complaint. So to give them a gee-up, follow your letter up with a call to the compliance officer and use the words “I’m mad as hell, absolutely livid, and I am lawyering up.”

Third, call the Financial Ombudsman Service on 1800 367 287 and register a complaint.

I can’t guarantee any of this will work, but it’s worth … a punt.

Scott

Trumped!

Scott,

I can’t believe the Americans could vote in such a loose cannon as Donald Trump. The experts are predicting that he will be an absolute disaster. The share market has been a rollercoaster and I am wondering what I should do with my shares, given that I am 10 years off retirement.

Beth

Hi Beth

There are many things we can learn from the US election, but the most important one is something I wrote a few weeks ago: experts are no better at predicting the future than my golden retriever, Buffett.

The experts predicted that Clinton had an 87 per cent chance of winning.

Wrong.

The experts also predicted that if Trump was able to pull off a miracle the share market would drop 13 per cent.

Wrong.

The US market has hit all-time highs this week. And now the media is going back to these so-called experts and asking them what happens next?!

And they say Donald Trump is crazy!

The truth is the election result has zero effect on where I am investing my money right now. Again, as I said a few weeks back, I just don’t think it matters who is in the White House in the short term, and in the long term compound interest takes care of itself.

However, I’m not surprised that the share market is hyped up because Trump is clearly pro-business (even though he’s not a pro at business himself):

First, he likes building things. And he has promised to embark on one of the biggest infrastructure spends in history.

Second, he’s not afraid of debt (as shown by his string of corporate bankruptcies), so I wouldn’t be surprised if he pushed things to the limit.

Third, he’s committed to dramatically slashing taxes in the most capitalistic country on earth. Like Ronald Reagan, he’s planning on a ‘trickle down’ approach -- allow rich people and companies to pay less tax and they’ll stimulate growth that will eventually trickle down to the workers. Or at least that’s the idea.

The final thing I’d say is this: the man lacks character. Whether it be the coach of a footy team or the CEO of a business, if you have a fundamentally flawed leader -- whose decisions are based on their own vanity and ego -- history has proven that it rarely works out well.

Still, I can’t control what goes on in the White House … the only thing I can control is what goes on in my house.

Scott

How Much Does it Cost to Have a Baby?

About four years ago, my wife entered our living room waving a pregnancy stick above her head like she was Mitchell Johnson triumphantly screaming HOWZAT! at the umpire. “We’re pregnant!” she cheered.

I was like a defiant Indian batsman disputing the inside edge. “Give me a look.”

We both stared at the plastic stick under the fluoro light in the kitchen. There wasn’t a second blue line.“Not out”, I boldly declared.

We ended up taking it to the third umpire -- our local GP -- who confirmed one of the great learning lessons of my life: my wife was right (she was pregnant). She’s always right. Even when she’s wrong, she’s right.

And if my life was a telemovie, the next scene would be a fast-moving montage (with Johnny Farnham’s ‘Playing to Win’ as the soundtrack), as we get married at our farm, have the baby (I almost pass out), the house burns down (I almost pass out), and we have another baby (thankfully, I’m now strong enough to cut the cord), and then the music fades down and we return to the present moment where I’m typing this to you ... as my three-year-old clean-bowls my one-year-old, and my wife yells at me like it’s my fault.

If you’re planning to start a family -- or even if you’re not -- the news that you are expecting a baby can knock you for six.

Here’s how to have a good opening partnership.

It costs $10,000 to have a baby? Howzat!?

In the year leading up to the pregnancy you should save up -- at the very least -- $10,000.

The average cost of having a baby in a private hospital is $8,500 per birth according to Medibank Private, and that doesn’t include obstetricians, nappies or ‘push presents’ that fathers are apparently supposed to buy to motivate their pregnant partners (like a bowling ball pressing down on them isn’t motivation enough).

Do you really need that much if you’re planning on delivering in a public hospital?

Yes, you do.

Sure, giving birth as a public patient in a public hospital is free -- but it’s what happens during the pregnancy that can really cost you. Think of all the visits to the doctor, the blood tests … and then there’s the ‘little emperor syndrome’. You see, most first-time parents go a little ga-ga when they are expecting.

I’m a classic case study of stupidity.

In the months leading up to my first son being born, I put more research into choosing a pram than I did into buying my first car (and I spent roughly the same amount). And when that state-of-the-art ‘all-terrain’ stroller was destroyed in our house fire ... I replaced it with a cheap and nasty $25 job from Kmart.

Think of having a baby as like starting a business. There are significant upfront costs that can be amortised over subsequent product releases, but these upfront costs are really going to hit you.

What you can do -- like any good business owner -- is to lower your costs by buying strollers, cribs and the like from Gumtree or eBay. Remember, it’s not child abuse for kids to wear hand-me-downs or, later, to share a room.

Still, that doesn’t alter the fact that you need a big chunk of change on hand for your first baby. You’re about to enter one of the most expensive periods of your life ... and you’ll be doing it on one wage -- with sleep deprivation and cracked nipples.

So for your sanity make sure you have at least $10,000 saved up.

Should We Go Private or Public?

We’ve done both, and I’d take public any day of the week. (That said -- I’m basing my opinion on the comfort of the chair I dozed off in, the cost of parking, and the fact that it was ... free). So I asked my wife and she agreed with me.

We’ve got one of the greatest public health systems in the world, and you’re already paying for it.

How Do I Know What I’m Entitled to?

New parents receive 18 weeks of paid parental leave, which works out to be $657 a week before tax, on top of whatever scheme their employer offers (and around half of all employers have some form of paid maternity leave).

Once your baby is born, you could be eligible for some Centrelink benefits, including the Family Tax Benefit, parenting payment, rent assistance or a health care card.To work out what you are entitled to go to Centrelink’s online ‘payment finder’. Then go to Moneysmart’s ‘parental leave calculator’ which will help you get a bird's eye view of your finances over the next 12 months.

My recommendation is that any parenting payments you receive should be in addition to the $10,000 you’ve saved up.

Should We Buy a House?

I get this question a lot from expecting first-time parents who currently rent. Some write to me in a state of panic at the thought of bringing their kid home to a rented home. But unless you have a 20 per cent deposit -- in addition to your $10,000 baby bounty -- I’d hold off buying a home for at least a few years.

Life is going to be very stressful without adding a move and a mortgage to the mix.

How Do I Ensure My Kid Gets a Good Start in Life?

By looking after yourself.

The first 12 months of being a parent are stressful. You have no idea what you’re doing. There’s very little sleep (at least in the beginning). You basically surrender yourself and serve the baby. And so the best gift you can give yourself in that first year is not having to fight or worry about money. And we’re planning on long innings with plenty of bouncers being thrown your way.

Howzat?

Tread Your Own Path!

What Happens When My Wife Dies?

Dear Scott,

My question to you is this. In your column you often state that couples should have their money in joint accounts. What happens when one passes away? We have been advised to have separate bank accounts just for such a situation, because when one passes away all accounts with their name on it are frozen, and the surviving partner has no access to the funds. How do you overcome this?

Robert

Hi Robert,

No, that’s not right. A bank will not freeze money in a joint account -- it belongs to both account holders jointly. If one of you dies, the other would have to present a death certificate to have the account changed over to their name only, but there’s no reason they wouldn’t be able to access the money in the joint account. Still, good on you for thinking about this stuff -- sorting out your affairs ahead of time is a really thoughtful, loving thing to do.

Scott

The $53,100 Question

Hello Scott,

I will be 65 next year and I am in good health. I have seen a financial advisor who advised me to transfer all my AustralianSuper money ($680,000) to Netwealth and to put it under my wife’s name so I can obtain a health card. We have cash and shares of $500,000 and no debts. Should I transfer at an entry fee of 4.5 per cent or stay with AustralianSuper? What is your opinion of Netwealth and the advice?

Bruce

G’day Bruce,

The strategy of sheltering your super in your wife’s name to reduce your assessable assets is a good idea. You can then qualify for a pension and a concession card, which can be worth up to $2,500 a year. (It gives you everything from free passes at your local tip to a cut on your rates bill and, of course, a range of concessions from the health system.) So in that sense it’s good advice.

However, you’re getting legged. If your advisor is charging you a 4.5 per cent entry fee, that works out to be $30,600, and if he can get his mitts on your other dough it’ll cost you $53,100. Bruce, just so you know, right now I’m leaning back in my chair, whistling, with one eyebrow cocked. Definitely do the strategy but stick with AustralianSuper. When your advisor follows up with you, give him a whistle for me.

Scott

Single Mum Buys a Home … but What About the Boyfriend?

Hi Scott,

I am a 33-year-old long-term single mum with a 16-year-old son, and I am finally ready to buy my first home. I am lucky enough to be in love with my defacto partner (of 10 months), who lives with us, but am wondering if I need a ‘worst case plan’ to protect the house in case we separate. All the deposit savings are mine, and my income is more than triple his. He is happy paying rent but could only afford around one-fifth of the weekly mortgage payments. Am I being paranoid or is it worth looking into a legal agreement?

Leslie

Hi Leslie,

You should be really proud of yourself. I’m proud of you. You rock!And you are not being paranoid -- you’ve worked bloody hard to get where you are, and you need to protect yourself and your son. Besides, you’ve known this dude only 10 months -- I’ve had toothbrushes that have lasted longer than that. You need to see a solicitor and get a binding financial agreement drawn up. Do this. Please.

Scott

The Church Just Gave Me $175,000

Hi Scott,

I have just won an insurance payout after seven years of fighting a rape case with the church. The payout will total $175,000 after my lawyers are paid. I am 27 and I work at a local library earning $48,000 a year. I want to use the insurance money to build a future, but I am so exhausted and overwhelmed from the case right now that I do not know what is best to do with it. Any suggestions?

Rebecca

Hi Rebecca,

I am so sorry for what you have gone through.

It is perfectly natural to feel overwhelmed right now. You’ve spent years fighting for justice and you’ve just received a huge, life-changing amount of money.

Oftentimes when people get a windfall, a lot of well-meaning people give them contradictory ideas on what they should do with it … all of which just causes more doubt, more indecision and more stress.

So I’m going to give you the same advice I give anyone who gets a major windfall: pay off any debts, stock up a three-month Mojo savings account, splurge on a well-deserved holiday, and -- most important of all -- lock the rest of the money up in a 12-month term deposit. You need to dial down the pressure and focus your energy on healing.

In the meantime, we’re going to use the money in the term deposit to build up your self-confidence. When it comes to finance, you don’t have to understand a thousand things -- you just need to know a few broad principles:

First, no one cares more about your money than you do.Second, keep things simple.

Third, focus on safety. Keep your three months of Mojo at the ready, then buy a home you can afford. Also, put your long-term retirement savings on autopilot by boosting your pre-tax super contributions from 9.5 per cent (what your employer pays) to 15 per cent (by adding some yourself). Then focus on paying your home off. That’ll keep you safe.

(Note to the reader: The details of this case have been changed for privacy reasons. I have spoken to Rebecca and have agreed to help her over the next 12 months and beyond.)

Scott

Buying the Family Farm

Hi Scott,

I grew up on a farm and have always wanted my own.My wife and I are in our late 40s. I work full time six days a week earning $145,000 per annum, and my wife works from home and earns little income. We are empty nesters with our adult kids having left home. We own our home and an investment property outright. We have $250,000 in savings and zero debts.The farm (weekender) I would like to purchase is 100-plus acres with no house costing somewhere between $600,000 and $800,000. A little voice in my head says, “Buy the farm. It’s what you have always wanted”, while another voice says, “It’s a lot of debt to get into -- plus further outlay such as tractors and fences.” What say you?

Doug

G’day Doug,

You’re obviously a little weird. It’s not normal to have paid off two homes and have $250k cash and still be in your 40s! Yet what good is having money if you can’t enjoy yourself?

I’d suggest you do three things:

First, buy a calendar.

Second, talk to a stock and station agent about leasing 100 or so acres. They’ll be able to find you a cocky who’ll bend over backwards to carve off a few paddocks for a year or two, especially if you don’t need a house on the block. It’ll cost you $5,000 a year tops.

Third, each time you return from a day at the farm put an ‘X’ on the calendar. At the end of 12 months, sit down with your wife and count up all the X’s.

You might find that working six days a week stops you from spending much time on the farm. You might find that your wife doesn’t share your passion for it. You might decide to continue leasing it as a (relatively) cheap hobby. Or you might find that you both love it and decide to buy your dream weekender.

Scott

Getting Better Returns

Hello Scott,

My husband and I are now retired. We spoke recently to a financial advisor about our super, which is currently in two industry funds (VicSuper and Equip Super). My super is worth about $250,000 and my husband’s is worth about $475,000. The advice was to roll our super over to MLC to get a better return. What do you think about this? My husband is keen, but I am not sure.

Marg

Hi Marg,

There’s no need to be confused. When the advisor was talking about ‘getting a better return’ it’s likely he was talking about himself -- he’ll get paid more if you switch to the products he flogs. He can’t guarantee that you will get better returns by simply switching to another product provider. In fact, most industry funds have underlying investment choices that are similar to what MLC offers -- the only difference is that in most cases industry funds are much cheaper.

Scott

Young Widow Wants Answers

Hi Scott,

I am a recently widowed 33-year-old mum of a one-year-old, and I am feeling the pressure of managing my finances. My situation: I have $350,000 in savings but I owe my in-laws $170,000. I have no other debt -- I own the house ($600,000), and some friends have set up an education fund for my child. My Centrelink single parenting payment application was rejected due to my having assets over $200,000. I plan to go back to work half time next year (earning $30-40,000) but I also want to focus on being a mum. Please help!

Nicole

Hi Nicole,

I’m sorry for your loss.

If I were in your situation, I’d do the following:

First, pay back your in-laws the $170,000. That way you don’t owe anyone anything, and you’re back on your own two feet.

Second, I’d put $10,000 in an online saver account (what I call ‘Mojo money’) so you don’t have daily money stresses.

Third, I’d make a $10,000 contribution to your super to kick it along.

Fourth, I’d invest the rest in an investment bond (in shares) for 10 years.

If you do this -- and you’re conservative with the value you ascribe to your car and other possessions (mark them down as gumtree value) -- you will get the full parenting payment (single) and the maximum family tax benefit A and B until your child turns eight.

Financially, you’ll likely be in a better position staying at home than you will working and paying childcare. In the long term you should work regardless (it’s good for your self-confidence), but right now you should take the opportunity to focus on the most important person in your life.

Scott

Mamma Wants Her Freedom

Hi Scott,

My partner and I have four houses -- three are investments. Together they are worth about $1.55 million, and we owe about $1.34 million on them. We each earn around $145,000 a year and each have about $175,000 in super. I have $52,000 in savings and he has about $15,000 (with two uni-aged children that he still heavily supports). We keep our finances separate. I want to have a baby in 2017 (I am 35) but not lose my independent position. How can I ensure smooth financial sailing?

Nat

Hi Nat,

Why are you planning on having a baby with a bloke when neither of you is prepared to share BSB numbers?

Okay, let’s sweep that elephant to one side for a moment and talk money.On your current income you’ll qualify for 18 weeks of paid parental leave (you may still be able to double-dip if your employer offers any entitlements, though that depends on what Derryn Hinch and his mates decide). Combine that with your $52,000 in savings and your ability to eventually go back to work, and you have the first couple of years sorted.

Now let’s get back to the elephant.

You’ve admitted that you are concerned about the risk of losing your financial independence. Good insight. Most women don’t fully understand the financial ramifications of their predicament until they’re knee-deep in nappies and suffering sleep deprivation.

So before he gets to the fun part of ‘creating’ the baby, you need to sit down together and address your concerns. Start the conversation off like this: “Honey, you need to understand that I’m going to have to take time out of my career and take a big pay cut so I can look after our baby.”

Understand this is not about your financial independence -- it’s about your financial security. In other words, you’re becoming a family so you need to tackle it together.

Scott

The Power of a Simple Plan

A couple of years ago my wife dragged me along to the opening of an art exhibition.

Dutifully, I stood there with a glass of bubbly in one hand and a quizzical look in the other. I felt as out of place as a sober dude on a dancefloor.

Worse, out of the corner of my eye I noticed a woman -- and what I assumed was her teenage son -- gawking at me.I caught the kid’s eye and he approached me.

“You’re the Barefoot Investor, right?”

“Yes”, I replied.He looked back over to his mother and nodded.

“Would you mind if my mum came over and spoke to you? She doesn’t want to bother you, but ...”

“Sure, I’m happy to help”, I smiled.

This happens to me quite a bit. I’m like Kim Kardashian, only people don’t want to take a selfie with me -- they just want advice on what to do with their Self Managed Super Fund.

She was a well-dressed woman in her 40s. She approached me nervously with a smile on her face, but as she got closer I saw tears in her eyes.

Then she said ...

“Two years ago I lost my husband. I was left with young kids. I didn’t know what to do. I was alone and I was really scared. I wrote to you one night, thinking you must get thousands of letters, and not expecting a reply.

But you did reply. And you gave me the advice I needed. You don’t know how much I needed to hear it at that point in my life. You can’t imagine how much you helped me”, she said with tears running down her cheeks.

So what amazing advice did I give her that produced such an emotional reaction?Nothing.

That’s right. I (basically) told her to do nothing.

She’d just received a very large life insurance payout and was overwhelmed with what to do. That’s totally normal behaviour by the way. It’s called the ‘paradox of choice’ -- an unlimited number of choices makes the decision process harder, not easier.

And her grief only compounded her indecision.The advice I gave her simply allowed her to release the pressure value.

I told her to pay off her mortgage (she was adamant that she wanted to stay in the family home), take her kids on a holiday, keep enough money on hand so she didn’t have to worry or work full time for the next year, and then lock the rest of the money up in a 12-month term deposit. That way she could spend the next 12 months grieving and caring for her kids.

In other words, keep it simple. And that’s good advice for you too. Let me explain.

We Don’t Know When We’re Getting Bad Advice

A major study conducted earlier in the year by the University of Sydney found that most Australians are unable to tell the difference between good and bad financial advice.

The researchers produced videos of a number of advisors -- some providing good advice and others providing bad financial advice. The videos were then shown to groups of people who were asked to identify which of the advisors they would trust.

The research found that trust in the advisors was easily manipulated. “We were able to show that if an advisor gave good advice on an easy topic (like paying off a credit card) that this formed a good impression in the mind of the client, so they continued to trust that advisor even when they gave them bad advice down the track”, said Professor Susan Thorp who led the study.We saw this in action this week.

The latest financial planning scandal reported by ASIC -- and there’s been a long line of them -- revealed that almost 200,000 clients have collectively paid for $178 million worth of ‘advice’ that they never actually received. In other words, those 200,000 people were so bamboozled with bulldust that they didn’t even know what they were being charged for.

Keep it Simple

So if the average person can’t tell whether they’re receiving bad advice, what’s the solution?

You should do what the widow did.

When you are presented with advice you do a gut check.

The simple plan of eliminating her debts and focussing on her family gave her an enormous sense of relief, a feeling of control over her life and best of all -- it was one she could understand.Here’s the rub: when you’re making a bad financial decision you almost never feel any of this.

If you don’t understand something -- or you are a bit hazy on the detail -- you should keep asking questions until the fog clears. Over the years I learned that whenever someone tries to makes things appear complicated it generally means they’re trying to sell you something.

I’ve helped thousands of people with their money over the past fifteen years, and the one overriding lesson is the power in keeping things simple.

You’ll never go wrong if you follow this advice:

First, saving is the bedrock of all true wealth and security.

Second, debt always adds risk. It always makes your life more complicated. If you can avoid it you should.

Third, the only thing you can control with your investments is the fees you pay. A wealth of research proves that the more your wealth manager takes the less you make.

And the final clincher is this: no one cares more about your money and your family than you do.

Tread Your Own Path!

Wave Your Wand

Hi Scott,

My wife and I, both 43, are having a difference of opinion. We owe about $8,000 on our mortgage and have $60,000 in cash. I hate debt, so I want to settle the mortgage right now. But she wants to take the cash and redraw another $150,000 off the mortgage to get wealth-creation cracking Barefoot style (we have only $150,000 combined in super at the moment). Yet in 12 months when we stop paying for childcare, we will be able to free up another $1,500 per month. Please, please wave your wand and make my wish come true!

Dom

Hi Dom,

Well this is interesting. In most cases that I see, it’s the husband who’s the risk-taker and the wife who’s wanting to put the brakes on. So let’s play a game of Family Feud. I’ll be Grant Denyer with the cheesy grin.

You said that you ‘hate’ debt. So your wife needs to understand that borrowing money against your home to buy shares is probably going to raise your blood pressure. If you don’t feel comfortable doing this, don’t do it. Besides, the good news is that you don’t need to take on more risk -- with your home paid off at such a young age, you’re going to be fine.

The biggest trap you can fall into at this point is upgrading your house or your lifestyle. If I were in your situation -- and planning on living in your place forever -- I’d do the following:

Pay the mortgage off immediately and get your title back.

Take the family on a holiday and celebrate your biggest financial achievement. You’ve earned it.Keep $15,000 in an online saver account for Mojo, and then put $30,000 into two investment bonds for your kids’ long-term future.

Then what? You could set yourself up for a multi-million-dollar retirement by salary-sacrificing $25,000 each into low-cost super funds and invest anything over that into shares (either through a family trust or in the lower earning spouse’s name).

Scott

Please Be Brutal, Barefoot

Hello Scott,

I am in my 60s and earn less than $30,000 a year. I have 1,000 Telstra shares which I am considering cashing in (I would get about $5,000) to buy my son a car. Yes, you are probably horrified, but seeing the joy on his face would give me more pleasure than the piddling dividends I receive. I also have $60,000 in a term deposit (another piddling interest rate.) Be brutal! I love your column.

Sandra

Hi Sandra,

It’s not about being brutal. It’s about being practical. You are nearing the end of your working life and your son is at the start of his. Smiles aside, who needs the five grand more -- you or him? (And Sandra, to avoid confusion, I think you do.)

I personally wouldn’t buy a car for my son -- mainly because he’s three years old and that would be ridiculous. Still, when he’s older, the best I’ll do is match whatever he saves dollar for dollar. A first car is a great tool for teaching your kids financial responsibility.

Scott

It’s 3AM and I Can’t Sleep

Hi Scott

It’s 3AM and I can’t sleep. I am looking at buying my first home and stressing about how much I can afford. I am single, earn $70,000 a year, and have a deposit of $175,000 (unexpected windfall mainly). The bank has approved me for a $340,000 loan. I have done the sums and it is pretty tight. Everyone says I am being too anxious, considering I also plan to rent a room out. Am I getting in over my head?

Sarah

Hi Sarah,

Here are three Barefoot rules that will serve you well.

First, always borrow less than the bank will lend you.

Second, do not spend your entire windfall on a home. Leave some aside for Mojo. Trust me on this. Homes are expensive.

Third, if you’re lying awake at 3AM and thinking of me, things aren’t right. You need to trust your gut.I’ve done the sums too, and it is a little tight even if you rent out a room.

Generally, I don’t like people devoting more than 30 per cent of their income to debt.I’m even more of a stickler for this given that interest rates are at all-time lows. Remember you’re taking on a 30-year commitment. Interest rates will rise.

So head over to Moneysmart.gov.au and check out their mortgage repayment calculator. Factor in higher interest rates -- say 6 or 7 per cent -- and redo your sums.

Scott

Granny is Flat

Dear Scott,

I am a 79-year-old retired lady, still active. I own my unit in Bentleigh, worth maybe $800,000. My son wants me to sell it, knock down their slum in Chelsea Heights, and build a place for all of us with a granny flat. I am unsure what to do -- I do not want to be out on the street should anything happen. What is your advice?

Carol

Hi Carol,

I think you sound like a very smart lady, and I wish more people asked questions like this.

Your son is proposing what’s called a ‘granny flat interest’, which basically means you’re paying for the right to live in the new place for the rest of your life, with your family looking after you. Even better, depending on your situation, it may not affect the age pension.

However, like anything involving family, things can go a little Gina (Rinehart). After all, we’re talking about a 20-year decision here. What happens if you decide you don’t want to continue living with each other? (And, if you have other children, what will you leave them?)

That’s why I’d like you to get some independent advice on this. Not because you don’t trust your son -- but because your relationship with your family is too important to leave anything to chance. As a first step, I’d suggest calling Seniors Rights Victoria on 1300 368 821 and speaking to one of their community-based solicitors.

Scott

Would you invest in ... whisky?

I often write about investments that sound too good to be true.There’s a reason for this: people continually ask me about investments that sound too good to be true.

So this week, just for kicks, I thought I’d revisit a couple of stories … a sort of financial catastrophe version of ‘Where Are They Now?’

Secret Property Options

In March I wrote about a ‘land banking’ scheme that once operated down the road from my family farm.

Busloads of mums and dads would do field trips to a farm on the outskirts of Melbourne that the developers had named ‘Secret Valley’. They’d wander around the paddocks sizing up what they were told was a canny deal.

The pitch was simple: Secret Valley is on the edge of the Melbourne sprawl. Eventually it will be swallowed up by suburbia. And if you’re smart enough to buy an option on a few plots of land from the promoters … you could become very, very rich.

How rich?

The marketing pitch to the people on the bus was that they could turn $120,000 into $1.2 million.

So what happened to the investors in the scheme?

Well, as I concluded at the time,“The investors in Secret Valley got roughly the same treatment that my ewes receive when I put a few daddy rams into the paddock.”

So what happened to the promoters of the scheme?

Well, this week they accepted 10-year bans from managing a corporation or operating a financial services business. They also agreed to pay ASIC’s legal costs of $50,000. However, they do not have to reimburse their investors -- who have likely lost millions.

Depressing? Too bloody right.

So let’s get on the grog.

Nant Whisky Barrels

Tasmania’s Nant whisky is a damn fine drop -- it’s been referred to as ‘liquid gold’ and it’s won gongs at the World Spirits Awards. But it was Nant’s ‘investment opportunity’, which I wrote about earlier this year, that really gave me a hangover.

Nant offered investors the opportunity to buy two barrels of their single-malt whisky for $25,000. Then they ‘guaranteed’ that in four years’ time they’d buy back the barrels for $36,007 (precisely). That worked out to be a 9.55 per cent per annum compounded return, which Nant plastered on their newspaper ads.

The entrepreneur behind Nant (and therefore behind the guarantee) was a property developer by the name of Keith Batt. (Well, he was a property developer until he went bankrupt owing $16 million.)

Two things happened after I published the story on Nant.

First, Nant investors came out of the cellar claiming that they were struggling to get Nant to buy back their barrels as promised.

Second, I kept tabs on Batt, figuring he’d eventually pull the pin.

That happened this week.

Nant’s assets are in the process of being sold to an outfit called Australian Whisky Holdings (AWH). This publicly listed private equity group has strategic holdings in other Tasmanian distilleries, and they’re apparently long-term investors in what is an exceptionally well-regarded world-class product -- Tasmanian whisky.

I called up a director of AWH, Chris Malcolm, and asked him whether the company will honour Nant’s guarantee to buy back existing investors’ barrels and deliver them a 9.55 per cent compound return.

Malcolm: “We cannot commit to anything until we have undertaken a full audit.”

Barefoot: “Why not?”

Malcolm: “Mr Batt has indicated there may be a … hole.”

Barefoot: “And just how big is this hole, Mr Malcolm?”Malcolm: “We do not know how big the hole is.”

Yet there was another Nant investment scheme that I wanted to ask Mr Malcolm about: cows.

Yes, cows.

See, after the barrels blew up, Nant came out with another opportunity for investors: the chance to buy a dozen purebred Black Angus breeding cows for $30,000.

Cowabunga!

And, just like with the whisky barrels, investors are lured by a guarantee. Nant will purchase the cows back in five years’ time for $47,335 (precisely) which delivers investors ... the exact same 9.55% compound return. Whisky? Cows? At least they’re consistent.

Unfortunately, there have been media reports of investors having a hard time tracking down the precise location of their cows -- and basically getting the same old beef jerky from Nant that the barrel owners are getting.

Mr Malcolm just laughed: “I can confirm that we are not ... haw, haw, haw … buying the cow business.”

And then his phone cut out.

Smelling the Bulldust

On the face of it, you couldn’t think of a more diverse set of investments: whisky, farmland, and cows. (Come to think of it, I’ve pretty much just described my father’s dream retirement.)

Yet while they’re all very different investments, they have four things in common:

First, their advertising made bold claims about their potential financial returns.

Second, they targeted mums and dads to invest via their Self Managed Super Funds (SMSFs).

Hold up for a second.

Anyone reading these ads would believe they were investing in a financial product, right? Especially given they were putting their superannuation nest eggs into these schemes.

Wrong.

That’s the third thing all these investments have in common. The promoters denied they were offering a financial product. And there’s a very good reason for this. If they were, they’d have to issue a Product Disclosure Statement (PDS) and be regulated by ASIC. They’d also have to apply for an Australian Financial Services licence, for which, among other things, you need to pass a good character test.

And the final thing they all had in common? They all sounded too good to be true.

Tread Your Own Path!

The Banks Have Nothing on These Guys

Hey Scott,

The banks were being questioned recently over their dodgy fees. So why aren’t member-owned companies -- like ASG -- in the same boat? I mean, instead of helping hardworking parents to save for their children’s education, they are taking money through high fees. For example, we invested $5,000 over five years and the balance looks like it is going be around $4,750. How is that supporting children’s education?

Mark

Hi Mark,

You’ve perfectly encapsulated everything I’ve been warning about Australian Scholarships Group (ASG) for the past 11 years. They’re a terrible (not-for-profit?) organisation. I chose your question for no other reason than each time I mention them in the national press, someone in ASG’s marketing department dies a little inside.

Scott

Love My Daughter

My daughter has a $300,000 home loan on which my wife and I have gone guarantor. The loan is split into two parts. Her payments have all been going to the larger proportion ($240,000), so she asked her bank about the best way to get rid of our guarantor commitment ($60,000). They have advised her to pay all her payments to the $60,000 component and change the $240,000 to interest only. I feel this may have long-term implications for her. What do you think?

Lorraine

Hi Lorraine,

My first thought is that if you’ve had the loan for a number of years, you should consider getting the property revalued. If the property has increased in value, you may be able to be released as guarantor. If it hasn’t, I have no problem with your daughter directing her efforts to knocking out your part of the loan. I hope she buys you a nice birthday present -- you deserve it!

Scott

Forex Millions

Hi Scott,

I recently attended a forex seminar. There was limited learning but much selling of a two-day course costing $13,000. Though with ‘amazing discounts’ the price was slashed to $5,500. I could not believe how many people signed up straight away. Soon I was receiving emails offering ‘more discounts’. Can regular people actually make money by investing in a short forex course?

Doug

Hi Doug,

I can’t work you out, dude. It’s like you don’t believe in the Tooth Fairy -- but you’re messaging me over the interwebs asking whether I think you should punch yourself in the gob, break off a tooth, put it under your pillow, and who knows … you could strike it rich, right?

Doug, there is no Tooth Fairy. And the only forex millionaires are the ones selling the courses.

Scott