Why I Quit Drinking

It’s been almost a year since I decided to stop drinking.

It all started when we headed off in the RV on our ‘lap around the map’ adventure.

I decided – on a whim – that I didn’t really want to drink around the kids (and, besides, hangovers with four kids in a seven-metre-long van would have driven me off the road).

So I nervously announced my major life decision to Liz.

She just frowned and said:

“But you don’t even drink that much anyway!”

(She’s my rock.)

Truth be told, I always thought I’d resume drinking when I got home from our RV trip. After all, I live in the country, and when we have a boys’ night out we organise a bus to drive us both to and from the boozer. (Think about that: there’s not even the slightest thought that we’d have a light beer and drive ourselves home. Oh no, it’s on like Donkey Kong.)

So my mates think I’m weird, but I think I’m ahead of the trend.

‘Non-alcoholic drinks’ is the fastest growing drinks category in Australia. Sales of alcohol-free sauce at Dan Murphy’s have increased by more than 100% in the past two years. Perhaps that’s why when Dan Murphy’s opened their first ever bar they decided to not serve any grog. That’s right, their bar in Melbourne is called ZERO%; it serves 30 zero-alcohol drinks on tap and offers more than 200 others to take home.

Yes, being off the booze is just so hot right now. The movement even has a name – ‘Sober Curious’ – which makes me want to get rolling drunk. For me it’s right up there with Gwyneth Paltrow’s $75 vagina candle (which actually sold out, so maybe it really is a thing).

There are two factors driving this long-term trend:

First, young people are drinking more responsibly than any generation before them. According to the Centre for Alcohol Policy Research, the number of 18- to 24-year-olds who don’t drink has doubled in the past 20 years.

Second, and most importantly, non-alcoholic drinks are getting a lot better.

So my favourite beer … isn’t actually a beer. It’s called ‘Hop Valley H20’ by the Heads of Noosa Brewing Co. It’s a mix of soda water and hops, and it’s the absolute bomb. It has zero sugar, zero calories and zero alcohol. Even my old man, a seasoned drinker, likes it.

And what about wine?

Well, last month I went to see Crowded House.

When I headed to the bar, I looked up and realised that the first five drinks were all non-alcoholic. So I ordered a glass of non-alcoholic red wine and took a sip … and it blew my Barefoot socks off.

“That is the BEST non-alcoholic red wine I’ve ever tasted!” I yelled at the barman.

“That’s because it’s red wine … sorry, I must have misheard you”, he said sheepishly.

Back to the Ribena for me!

Tread Your Own Path!

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I Have Tears in My Eyes

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